


Fighting at Midnight

by Claudii85



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Getting Back Together, Good friend Magnus, Happy Ending, M/M, Sad Jace Wayland, Sad Simon Lewis, So much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2019-02-12 12:17:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12959013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Claudii85/pseuds/Claudii85
Summary: Simon threw a glass against the wall with all the energy he had left, hoping to get Jace to react. But Jace stayed there, motionless and stoic like every time they fought. Simon wanted him to scream, to cry, to do something to show him he cared enough to fight back.Simon felt his eyes watered and at this moment he hated himself more than he ever did in his short life. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and took a deep breath.“Jace say something, anything”, pleaded Simon, too tired to scream anymore.“I don’t know what you want me to say" sighed Jace.





	Fighting at Midnight

**Author's Note:**

> [vicepresidentsimon](http://archiveofourown.org/users/vicepresidentsimon/pseuds/vicepresidentsimon) asked for jimon + fighting at midnight. 
> 
> This is semi inspired by my neighbors who loves fighting in the middle of the night. This turned a lot more angsty thst it was supposed to be, I am really sorry.
> 
> I hope you'll like it.

Simon threw a glass against the wall with all the energy he had left, hoping to get Jace to react. But Jace stayed there, motionless and stoic like every time they fought. Simon wanted him to scream, to cry, to do something to show him he cared enough to fight back.

Simon felt his eyes watered and at this moment he hated himself more than he ever did in his short life. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and took a deep breath. 

“Jace say something, anything”, pleaded Simon, too tired to scream anymore.

“I don’t know what you want me to say" sighed Jace.

*

“I LOVE YOU JACE, I FUCKING LOVE YOU DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THAT? DO I MEAN SO LITTLE TO YOU THAT YOU DON’T FUCKING CARE? YOU COULD HAVE DIED TONIGHT AND I SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN WORRIED?” shouted Simon at the top of his lungs. 

It was midnight and he knew he should calm down and scream a little less louder, some people wanted to sleep probably but right now he couldn't care less. Jace had once again put his life in danger, thinking about himself only and he was tired of always be scared Jace would not make it home alive.

Simon wanted to shake Jace until he said something, until he snapped back.

“Don’t you love me?” asked Simon, his voice small, scared of the answer he could get. But he was ready for the answer if that meant Jace said something.

“Of course I love you" answered Jace.

*

Simon had enough. He loved Jace with all his heart and the idea of leaving him was unbearable but he knew that’s what he had to do. Jace said he loved him but acted like someone who had nothing to lose. The fight were more and more frequent and Simon knew he couldn't live like this. He threw his clothes in a duffel bag only stopping to wipe his eyes. Jace was on a mission and Simon knew he was being a coward by leaving while Jace was absent but he knew he would not be able to face him.

He took the magnetic notepad they kept on the fridge and wrote a goodbye note. He left the note on the kitchen table with his key next to it.

*

Simon knocked on Magnus’ door, conscious that it was past midnight and Magnus was probably asleep or busy with...well he preferred not to think about this option. At his surprise, Magnus opened the door almost immediately. 

“Simon, what are you doing here so late?” Magnus asked, concern evident in his voice.

“Do you, do you think I could use my old room for a few days?”

Magnus let Simon enter and lead him to his old room.

“Can I ask why? If you prefer not to talk at the moment feel free to tell me, it’s not a problem.”

Simon sighed, he knew he would have to tell Magnus. He was not an idiot, he knew Magnus would want to know, so the sooner the better.

“If you don’t mind I’ll take a shower and I’ll join you in the living room after?”

“Take all the time you need darling. I am not going to bed any time soon anyway.”

Magnus left the room and Simon undressed himself. He put his clothes in the hamper in the corner of the room and took a towel in the closet. He walked slowly to the ensuite bathroom and stopped to look at himself in the mirror. Simon looked terrible, his hair were a mess and he had bag under his eyes. He didn’t even think vampires could get them. Simon turned on the water and waited for the water to get boiling hot. He stepped in the shower and put his forehead against the wall letting the water fall over his body for a long time before he took the shampoo to clean his hair. 

When he finally felt clean enough he got out of the shower, putting the fluffy towel around him. He dried himself before putting on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. 

He exited his room and joined Magnus in the living room where he was reading a book. 

“I have blood in the kitchen if you want", said Magnus before he closed his book and put it on the coffee table in front of him.

“That would be great", answered Simon before walking toward the kitchen. 

He took a bottle of blood and walked back to the living room. He sat in silence next to Magnus for a long minute before he started talking.

“I, uh, I left Jace.”

“You what? I thought you two were in love?”

“I am, I’m just not sure that he is. He tells me he loves me but he act recklessly like he has nothing to lose, like I don’t exist. I understand that he is a Shadowhunter. I’m not stupid but I wish he was more careful. And when I try to talk about it, it always end in a fight. And I’m tired. I can’t take it anymore, I love him but I don’t have the energy to fight anymore.”

By the time Simon stopped talking he was crying and Magnus was hugging him tightly, stroking his hair and telling him everything would be alright. Simon didn't believe him but it still felt great to hear it. The door opened and Magnus disentangle himself from Simon to look over his shoulder even if he knew that was Alec coming back from his mission. Alec removed his boots and walked into the loft.

“Why is the vampire here?”

“I thought we were passed that?” said Simon, glaring at Alec.

“Not when you break my brother’s heart. Really Simon? Breaking up with him by a post-it note? This is low.”

Magnus turned his head to look at Simon.

“You omitted this little detail.”

Simon looked at his feet, blushing. Yes he had voluntary omitted this detail because he knew it was wrong. He should have done it face to face.

“If you had seen his reaction Simon, I never saw Jace like that. Do you know now much my brother love you? Do you know?”

“If he loved me that much he had a very weird way of showing it!” shouted Simon. “I’m going to bed" said Simon leaving the room. He heard Alec and Magnus talking in low voice. He knew they were talking about him and if he really wanted to know what they were saying he could have used his vampire hearing but it was late. Simon fell asleep almost immediately when he dropped his head on the pillow.

*

What was supposed to be a few days turned into a month and another. The first time he came face to face with Jace was awkward. Simon was surprised it took so long considering he was living in the same house as Alec. Simon got out of his room and Jace was sitting at the table in the kitchen.

“Hi", said Simon, his hand rubbing the back of his neck nervously. 

He hadn't seen nor talked to Jace since the break up. He didn't know how Jace was gonna react.

“Hi.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Waiting for Alec, he’s packing his bag we have to go to Idris.”

“Okay.”

Jace was looking everywhere except at Simon. He got up and walked out of the kitchen without another word. Well, it went better than Simon imagined. 

*

A few days later Simon came back from a meeting with Raphael and Jace was sitting on the couch, alone. Simon knew the loft was empty but maybe Jace was waiting for Alec to come back.

He nodded at Jace and went directly to his room. He lay on his bed and took a book from his nightstand trying not to think about Jace sittin in the living room.

A soft knock in the door startled Simon. He sat up and closed his book.

“Come in.”

Jace opened the door but he stayed in the doorway, his arms crossed. Simon looked at him expectantly, after all Jace was the one who had came to his room.

“Can we uh, can we talk?”

Simon nodded and pat the bed next to him. Jace walked inside but instead of sitting on the bed he went to the armchair in the corner of the room.

“I understand why you left. I wish you had told me face to face but I understand. I was a lousy boyfriend and I acted like an asshole. All my life I’ve believe that “to love is to destroy and to be loved is to be destroyed" and it’s hard to go passed that. It doesn't excuse how I acted.   
I was selfish and you put up with me a lot longer than I thought you would. Every day I was surprised you were still there. When I came back and I found your note I lost it.   
Good thing Alec was with me or I would probably have destroyed the apartment. I was so mad because even if I suck at showing it I love you so much Simon you can’t even begin to imagine. I never loved someone as much as I love you. I am not here to ask you to take me back, it would be incredibly selfish of me because I know I still have to work in my issues but can we, maybe try to be friend again? Because I miss you Simon, I miss you so fucking much.”

Simon couldn't believe it, he was the one who had broke Jace’s heart and acted selfishly and yet, Jace was the one apologising. In a little bit more than a year in a relationship with Jace he had never heard him talk so much and he knew how much courage it must have take him to come knock on his door. And if Simon was honest with himself he missed Jace too.

“Yes, we can.”

A small smile appeared on Jace face. Simon had missed this smile.

“Can I hug you?” asked Jace.

“Of course, come here" answered Simon, opening his arms.

Jace rose from the armchair and sat next to Simon. They hugged for a long time. It’s Magnus who found them. He smiled and told them he was happy to know they had finally had the talk they needed to have.

“You know, it’s Alec who practically forced me to come talk to you. I think he was tired of seeing me moping around my apartment.”

Simon laughed.

“Sorry, it’s not funny and it’s my fault.”

 

*

Being friend with Jace was something else. He had never been really friend with Jace. Jace was always on mission and sometimes Simon would tag along. They came back home, they would eat and fuck and that was it. Sometimes when they had a little bit of down time they would watch a movie. But it was rare. So for them to go out to see a movie or to eat in a restaurant it was weird. But a good weird. They were learning to know each other like they should have done instead of jumping in a serious relationship when they were both not ready for it. Jace had commitment issues and Simon knew that the attraction he felt for Jace was due to the fact that he had drank his blood. They loved each other but it was not right. 

They started seeing each other every week, making time for each other. Like they should have done at the start of their relationship. 

*

-One year later-

Jace and Simon were walking in silence around Central Park. It was almost Christmas and the air was cold. It was a nice night and Simon felt genuinely happy, happier than he had felt in a long time. After a while he felt Jace tentatively taking his hand and entwining their fingers. Simon looked at their hands and smiled at Jace. In the last few weeks they had started holding hands, something they barely did when they were together. Every time Jace did it Si on felt like his heart would burst out of his chest even though his heart was not beating. 

A gust of wind made Simon shivered. Jace tightened his hold on Simon’s hand and brought him closer to him.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home before you freeze to death”, teased Jace.

When they arrived at the loft they stood face to face a little bit awkwardly,p, like none of them wanted this evening to end. Simon knew he didn’t want it to end. He hadn't felt this good in a long time.

“I wanted to ask you something" said Jace.

Simon nodded and Jace continued to talk.

“Do you think we could try to maybe date again?” asked Jace, a slight blush creeping on his face.

“I thought that’s what we’ve been doing in the past few months?” teased Simon as he played with Jace’s fingers. 

“You know what I mean.”

“I’m not sure.”

Jace blushed again. Simon loved it.

“I want us to be boyfriend again, officially I mean.”

Simon smiled and nodded. He think he was ready to try it and give a second chance to their relationship. He had noticed how Jace had been more opened with emotions in the past year. He had worked on himself and Simon knew that his feelings for Jace were genuine and not just because of the blood. 

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes" murmured Simon.

Jace smiled and closed the gap between their mouths. 

-FIN-

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed your reading. Comments and kudos are always welcome and appreciated xx


End file.
